Reflection Friday

Ah it's Friday again and let me just tell you the last couple of days have been a challenge. I have been more hungry than normal and knew something had to be wrong. So I started to read back through my blog (side note: any bloggers out there I highly recommend you do the same) and saw this post about breakfast. Ah eggs, the incredible edible egg. Seems so simple. Packed with protein and goodness. So this morning I went to the fridge trying to figure out what to have for breakfast and it was almost as if the eggs jumped out of the carton into my hands. So you might ask what I did with them, well I took yellow and green peppers, onions, mushrooms, and jalapeno and sauteed then made an omelet topped with fresh tomato. I also had a yogurt. I have nothing against fruit in the morning, but protein does my body good. I am satisfied and should be till lunch time. and if not I have a couple of Kashi bars and a banana on stand by. So this post is in praise of eggs and re-reading your own words. Funny how we can forget the simple things so very quickly.

A note on my exercise: I have been to the gym 1 day since weigh in. I was tired one day and today had to tend to a slightly ill Chuck Norris (the dog). I will be back at it hard this weekend, and then Monday and Tuesday. Hoping to get in 5 workouts total. That means 4 in the next 4 days. Then I will take next Wednesday off.

If I don't drop in for a visit over the weekend I hope you all have a safe and fun weekend!

A loss!

Amazing really. I lost .4 lbs. That would be 4 tenths of 1 pound for those of you who skimmed over the period.

I was anticipating a gain of about a pound or so. That means that this weight watcher is pretty darn happy. Let me just explain to you in a bit more detail what kind of things happened over the weekend. On Friday we went to Strouds. Strouds is world renowned for fried chicken, they also have great pork chops and a pretty mean steak to. Their portions are huge and served family style. I will tell you I had a single fried chicken breast and ate about half of it. And no I did not pull off the skin and throw it away, I ate it. Its the best part! (click here to see the menu and I challenge you to pick something healthy) On to Saturday, Well Saturday was not nearly as delicious as Friday but probably worse because we had chinese, cashew chicken to be exact. Nothing fried their but the brown sauce is not great and the sodium is off the charts. Sunday you might think would be a day of rest. Umm no. Sunday was grilled kabobs, potatoes, corn, and assorted sides. Well all in all the food was not horrible, but it could have been the 6 or so beers I had. Monday was better but still not great with a grilled burger, corn and potato.

So there you have it. A weekend that probably should have put me on the plus side of the scale but I some how pulled of a loss. I think probably it was the exercise. Had I not done all the things I did to work up a sweat I would have gained. I am happy with the result and look forward to a strong week this week without a holiday to lead me astray. Although we are headed to the Ballpark Friday. Well there will always be hurdles to get over. My job is to get over them with the best of my ability and move on.

Have a great day everyone!

I am off the diet.

Well Memorial day weekend came and went and there were beers and grilling and a doughnut or two and a few other miscellaneous things that are not going to contribute to my success on weight watchers. You know what, I am ok with it this time. It was a Holiday weekend. I indulged but did not over do it like I would have in the past. I do not have the guilty feeling I would have had 6 weeks ago. 6 weeks ago I would have been upset with myself and analyzed to death where I went wrong and how I could change my behavior. Well this weekend I had a bit of an epiphany. I was on a diet 6 weeks ago. I was probably on a diet up until this weekend when I realized that I can indulge, even for a weekend, but not over do it. Then I just need to get back to my healthy ways as soon as possible. It was funny how it hit me. I was just kind replaying the weekend in my head and I came to realize that I was never angry with myself for making unhealthy choices. I know how I got to the weight I was at and I know how I have lost 72 lbs. I never want to gain again, but if I do, then I can accept it and move forward. I am not on a diet any longer. I know that I can make a decision on a Saturday that will not effect what I do on Monday. It is a pretty empowering feeling to know that you now have the reins and are more in control. I will obviously continue with weight watchers. I just feel like I am beginning to see the "its not a diet" bit that they preach.

I hope you all had a safe and happy holiday. I will see you this evening with a weigh in update.

Reflection Friday

Son at Roaring River playing some wiffle ball.

So this Friday morning I am thinking about a few things that have changed. I think probably the best thing of all is my attitude. Prior to starting this journey my attitude has kinda crappy. I tried to be to fun loving guy that everyone knew, but it was getting harder and harder. Now I just feel better. I feel like I can take on anything. I am sure there are a number of things that contribute to it but I will point out the few that I believe to be the most significant. First is just pure health. Eating right and exercising for the first time in my life had had a huge impact. Which leads me to number 2. I think exercise is just huge. You cannot get from caffeine or a drug what you get when you work out and get your blood pumping. It just never fails. I am always more awake and have a better outlook on my day when I get up and go to the gym. The third is difficult to explain but I will try. I think success has a lot to do with my attitude as well. I think that can also be something to be wary of. If we are not losing at the pace we feel like we should or if we have gained we need to make sure we refocus out energy.

Other thing to reflect on? Well I have a story for you. One of incredible laziness and one of personal triumph. Just last summer I was playing wiffle ball with my son and he would regularly hit the ball over the fence. Last summer it was always his job to go get the balls. God forbid that I walk my lazy butt to go get them. Well this spring is a bit different. He goes and gets some. I go and get some. I even ran to get a few when I had my tennis shoes on. Then yesterday he and I actually raced to go get a ball. I struck me then that I am in much better shape and because of that I am spending better time with my son. Now that is why I am doing this!

Have a great weekend all!

I am not sure what to say.

I am a bit in awe right now. I am not sure how to feel or how to act. I want to jump up and down and scream and yell but for some reason it doesn't seem right. This week I lost 5.4 pounds. I can tell you this is a result of hard work at the gym, eating on plan nearly all week, and lots of water. I have now lost over 70 pounds. 70. Just crazy.

In a conversation with my brother last night he brought up my only regret in this whole journey. He said "you are doing awesome, but don't you kind of wish you had done this 10 years ago?" I of course wish I had and that is my biggest regret but ultimately as he said. Going to Weight Watchers took a lot of maturity. He probably does not realize what a compliment that is. I think it is like a drug addict realizing that he has a problem and checking themselves into rehab.

So why am I not jumping up and down. A couple of reasons. First one is I am beginning to notice that other WWers are less motivated by my success and more jealous of it. I am not sure how to deal or if I should even bother to deal with this. Regardless I am noticing. Second is I am kind of in awe of my success. Not sure why 70 pounds is such a big deal, but for some reason it is. I would have thought 100 but for some reason 70 has me looking back and realizing that I am doing something right now that most people have a hard time with.

I want to take a moment to thank my readers. You guys are great. If I am void of things to say prior to the weekend I want you all to have a wonderful holiday weekend!

Starting to notice

Well Monday morning and I figured I should post a little something.

There are a few things I am starting to notice. The first is not as good financially. I am going to need new shorts for the summer. I think I have 1 pair that look alright. The rest I am swimming in. Good sign, but it will be costly. I guess I knew it was coming, but I was hoping that maybe I could get away with it for a bit longer. I guess next weekend might be spent trying on clothes ans making a trip to the Salvation Army.

The second and third I had begun to notice a few weeks ago but kinda did not think a lot of it until last night and again this morning. My brother mentioned something about when he lost some weight the he felt better in the car. Granted my brother is nowhere near my size but he is almost as tall and from time to time he will fluctuate up and down about 25 lbs or so. When he mentioned this it really brought to light how much better I "fit" in my truck now. It was never a huge issue and never uncomfortable. But I just feel better now. The other is somewhat related and is more personal and public. I have stopped requesting a table at restaurants. 5 months ago I had trouble in booths. Sometimes it would be fine and others it would be a very tight fit. Well I went to dinner with my girlfriend and a couple of friends last night and was really very comfortable in the booth. That was a very nice feeling.

So thats about it for today. I will check in with you all tomorrow after weigh in. It will be 16 weeks on WW. They do something special once you get to 16 weeks. I guess it is because they feel like your beginning to make the lifestyle changes necessary to continue on throughout your life at that point. I will let you know what happens and how it goes.

Workin out

Well I had a fist this morning. I went to the gym and did something I have not been able to do just yet. First though I should tell you how this all began.

Each time I go to the gym I hop on the elliptical and do my best. When it all began I was doing 5-10 minutes before and about 5 minutes after my weight training. After a couple of weeks of that I talked to the trainer and she said I should be doing it all at once, so I began doing 20 minutes at a time and I am now up to 30 minutes on a level 3. All of this is pretty much trivial, but the cool thing is this. Every time I had hopped on before to day I would have to occasionally support my weight to catch my breath. Today, I never did it. I stayed with it the whole time. I burned my normal 700 calories and felt great. From now on the goal is not now have to do that anymore.

Also on a side note. When I began this process I was bench pressing a meager 70 lbs at 3 sets of 10. I know I know it is incredibly weak. You would be shocked how little you use your upper body when you weigh 400 lbs. The flip side of that is that I can do a leg press of over 350 lbs. Back to the bench press. I started at 70 and now I am doing 3 sets of 10 at 105. Thats a 50% increase in just a couple of months.

Whenever I start complaining again remind me to reread my blog. I was such a pansy a week or so ago. I just need to buck up and face it that there are times when you fall off the wagon and you just have to pick yourself up and hop back on.

WW Graph

I figured since I hit the 50lb mark at WW I should share the graph again. I do enjoy watching that line go down.

Holy Crap!

Umm this was unexpected. After basically a week back on the wagon and getting in 4 workouts from last weigh in till this one I was expecting a loss, but nothing like what I saw. I had my biggest loss to date. 15 weeks into this and I dropped a mind blowing 7.4 pounds. Did you hear that. 7.4 pounds. I am not sure what happened but I have a few thoughts. The first is probably sodium. The 1 pound gain last week was likely sodium. Lots of fried things on the weekend of food debauchery. The second could be the whole throwing your body a curve ball is good thing, but I am not really buying it. If I really think about it I think what happened was this.

The few days prior to "the" weekend I was on track and probably had a loss during that time. "The" weekend caused some weight gain and retention of some serious water. The result: a gain of one pound. The next week I am back on plan and the water weight flies off along with a few "actual" fat pounds. So what is todays lesson.

Well the first would be to never enjoy the greasy yummy foods I so thoroughly enjoyed on that particular weekend, but that is unrealistic. So the lesson is this. Enjoy something from time to time and realize that not only are you adding fat to your body, but your likely going to retain some water too.

I was so happy to see that number. I instantly felt better about the prior week and instantly realized that I did not need to beat myself up. I felt like I did pretty good about not getting to upset about it, but I was upset to some degree. I think that bogging the experience will help in future gains. Remembering what happened and how I handled it will be key to future success.

Weigh in day and I am excited and a little recipe

As you all know by now it is Tuesday and that means it is weigh in day and I am excited. Not because I think I dropped 10 lbs this week. But because I am officially all the way back on the wagon. My feet are not hanging off or anything. I am firmly planted right in the middle and feel very much in control. I am sure I will be thrown from the wagon again at some point, and probably sooner than I would like, but for right now I am very happy with where I am at. So bring on the weigh in. I'm ready!

I did promise a small recipe in the title so lets get on with it.

This was inspired from 2 unused limes left on the counter this morning. What I created was a very light and fresh dressing that just feels a bit tropical.

Honey Lime Salad Dressing (Single Serving)

Juice of 1 and 1/2 limes (about 2 Tbs)
2 tsp olive oil
2 tsp honey
1/2 tsp ground mustard
salt and pepper to taste.

Looks like about 3.5 pts, but you might wanna check that.

The weekend that was

Well I feel much better about this weekend than I do the last. I ate 100% better than last weekend. Got in a workout on Saturday morning. A late evening on Saturday night prevented a Sunday morning workout, but I will either be walking or riding my bike tonight. Even though my goal was to work out every day up until weigh in I am not upset that I missed a day. I feel like the first step to leading a healthier lifestyle and losing weight is to make better choices. I did that this weekend. Second will be to get more active. I am pretty much back on the horse in that regard, I just need to find a schedule that really works for me. The early morning thing is good cause that is when I have time, but as the sun is staying high in the sky later into the evening I want to stay up later, and that leads to a lack of sleep to try to roll out of bed at 4:50am.

Ultimately when it come to my weight loss journey this weekend was great. I am beginning to realize that this indeed is a long process and my early success may have blinded me to that. I am starting to feel less guilty for not making to the gym but still realize that I need to make sure I am moving more. More that anything I feel more in control in situations in the past where I would be doomed for failure. Yes this was a good weekend.

I hope all of you had a great weekend. Happy Mothers Day to all you Moms out there.

Took till friday, but I am back on the wagon.

Well what can I say. I guess I should take my own advice. I should read my own blog as really it exists for the purpose.

I finally feel like I am back on the wagon today after just over a week off. I feel much better today and really had I just looked back I would have realized why I was feeling down and had so little energy. Going back to the gym this morning and getting on the elliptical for a half hour and then hitting the weights felt good. I feel much more awake this morning and feel like I am more ready to face the day.

A few observations of my time off the wagon. I seemed to eat out of boredom and depression more. The urge to snack was much greater than normal. I was just dog tired most of the time. Which makes me wonder, was that how I was feeling before? Was I really that tired? Was I that down? I am guessing probably not, but I can tell you that hoping off the wagon for a week will not be advised in the future. It is an extremely slippery slope that can lead you right back where you started pretty quickly. I personally feel a step off the wagon is fine. Any one of those meals I mentioned in my last post would have been fine but when combined I just hoped on the slide and pushed myself along.

I will not be taking the weekend off this week as I want to make sure to stay on track. My plan right now is to go to the gym, tomorrow (Saturday),Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday. I will rest Wednesday and Get back Thursday and Friday. Then the following week I will be back on the normal weekday schedule. I hope to begin training for the 5K in the week of the 19th.

Thank you to everyone for the support and the kicks in the butt. I really needed it. This felt like a tough test and I am sure there will be more to come. I just pray that you will all be around to pull me back up when I fall again. I will be there for all of you.

A 1 lb gain and Addiction

I will just go ahead a say it. I gained 1 lb. I knew it was coming and honestly I was not upset about it until about 9pm last night. I weighed in at 5:15 and stuck around for the meeting and then proceed to my friends house to continue working on their deck. I had a wonderful dinner there and then came home. When I got home I was still a bit hungry (or so I thought) so I went to the fridge and grabbed leftover pizza! 3 slices later I was feeling horrible. Which brings me to the real topic of the day. Addiction.

Hello, my name is Matt and I am a foodaholic. I eat for many reasons and hunger is probably last on the list. Lets first take a look at enjoyment. I do enjoy preparing and eating good food. But anymore the enjoyment derived from an unhealthy meal or snack is very short lived. Then there is depression. This one is particularly bad because of the downward spiral effect. You enjoy eating something bad for a short time and then you get upset about it. What better way to cure that depression then eating more bad foods? Yes eating out of depression is not a good thing. Boredom. The worst of my foes. I eat because I am bored. God forbid I read a book or clean the house. Nope, crack open a bag a chips and dig in while the cable TV washes over me. And then we get to hunger. Hmm what is hunger. Do I know it. Do I really understand it? I know I can go a whole day without eating if I am busy and not feel hungry, and yet other times I can't go an hour. Do I eat because I am hungry? I would say probably not.

So I think there is an underlying issue at hand with all of this. I think the I along with many others are stricken with food addiction. An addiction to sugars and fats and salts. An addiction that allows us to rationalize poor decisions. This addiction might be the toughest of all to face. While I have never been an alcohol or drug addict and cannot speak to their experience I see one key difference to the addictions. In order to sustain life one must eat. You do not need alcohol, drugs or tobacco to live. Food and water however are needed. So while trying to battle this addiction we must still eat. We cannot quit cold turkey, and try as we might to eliminate the fats and sugars from our diets we simply cannot.

So my question is this for today. Are you addicted to food? I feel that I am. How are you overcoming it?

Weigh In day - Back on the wagon

After a few days off the wagon I am back on. I want to say a couple of things.

Jay - Not your fault. You did not tie me down a force feed the delicious In-a-Tub tacos down my throat.

I am not all that unhappy that I did fall off the wagon. It is most definitely a learning experience. First as I stated before, your body does not process food the same way anymore and when you throw a bunch of crap in it, there is a digestive system revolution. Second once your off the wagon getting your lazy ole bones back on said wagon is difficult. Your motivation wanes and you begin to think about the convenience of having pizza for dinner and McDonald's for lunch.

The other thing I am wondering about is this. The theory that eating different foods throws your metabolism for a loop and kicks it back into high gear. This was mentioned on an episode of the Biggest Loser this year. All I have to say is that it would sure be nice if that were the case. Obviously I will keep you all updated with that one because if anyone threw their metabolism for a loop this weekend it was me.

So that pretty much brings us up to date. Tonight is Weigh In if they are open as the tornado did some damage to the building they are in.

Build a Deck, Eat like crap and its a good thing.

I did not track anything this weekend and mentally I do not feel awful about it. But let me outline the weekend quickly. Friday was fine until our waited brought out a free dessert. Who was I to say no to free dessert. Still all in all, not awful. Let move along to Saturday. I figure points vs activity I was fine. We were building a deck I and we worked for probably 10 hrs. So I ate a breakfast burrito and then did not eat again till dinner and I have 3 slices of pizza and a big salad. No problem there. Sunday was again probably fine but We had bagels and cream cheese for breakfast, In-a-Tub tacos for lunch (for those of you who don't know, it is a corn tortilla stuffed with meat and beans and then deep fried, cracked back open and topped with lettuce, sauce and powdered orange cheese like you use for box mac and cheese. YUMMY) I had sonic popcorn chicken and tots just before bed. Nothing particularly healthy over the weekend. But I am not all that upset about it. We worked a lot and got a lot done. In fact it may have been a good thing. Last night after finishing the popcorn chicken I feel like I was gonna hurl. I drank a glass of water and got ready for bed and quickly fell asleep. I woke up this morning and still felt crappy. So I think something might have been learned from all this. Are you ready for this revelation? All that crappy food combine will make you not feel so good after eating right for so long. I think I would have been fine if I had just one or the not so great items but all of them pushed me over the edge. So I will keep you posted. hopefully I will feel better over the next several hours.

This is what we built.

Rambling

No fun title today as this one is kind of a record for me to refer back to, Sorry y'all.

We had pizza last night. I had three glorious slices and put the pizza away for the night. That was dinner and I was out of daily points. Then I proceeded to have a WW shake, a couple of handfuls of popcorn (not the good for you kind either), and to top it of a bowl of soup before bed. The soup was a veggie with some whole grain penne pasta.

I am trying to figure out why I was more hungry last night. I am wondering if the pizza is so carb laden and lacks the protein I need. I might have to experiment with that and see if that is really the case. The decisions I made after the pizza were not horrible but I really dont like dipping into my weekly flex points. I need to have some point free options in the house. Carrots, celery, other veggies.

This just teaches me that I still have lots to learn when it comes to nutrition and my body. It also tells me that I need to assert more will power and try to not eat out of habit, boredom or stress. I did not think that the storms that rolled through last night would have caused me to stress eat, but I suppose it is possible.

On to the other ramble of the day. Don't let anyone ever tell you walking is not exercise. I walked the tree miles on Wednesday night and I am still sore from it. Not sore in a hurting way, sore in a good way. If I intend on doing this 5K I will need to keep working on it. Running the whole thing will be a challenge, but that is really what I am all about. With that said I am taking a few days off from the gym. I did not go this morning and will not go over the weekend. Monday I will be back with more focus. I intend on using the treadmill a bit more to begin to train for the 5K.

Zack if you happen to be reading this the KC Marathon/Half/5K is Oct 18th and I can use that time for the World Wide Half /5K. I would love it if you and I could run it together. I know you are really busy and I know it would be a stretch but if possible I would really like to cross the finish line with you.

That is all for today, not sure how the weigh in is gonna treat me next week, and at this point I am not sure that I am that concerned. I am learning and I think that is the difference with WW. Learn to live as opposed to learning a diet.

I am just beat.

I am sure I have posted about this but it is worth saying again. Exercise in the morning is far superior to exercise in the evening, in my opinion.

Last night I went and walked. I walked 3 miles in just under an hour. I was not pouring sweat like I do on the elliptical, but it was a good workout. In fact I think I am going to start adding that to my routine. Whether it is on the treadmill or just outside I am gonna start to walk more. Partially in preparation for the 5k I signed up for, but also because it is just different. Over time I will work up to running portions of it, but for now I need to work on the walking and build up the strength in my knees.

So why the title? Well I tried to wake up to get to the gym this morning and just could not do it. I was able to work out Monday night and make it in Tuesday morning, but I think my turn around workout limit it 1 per week. So hence forth if I end up working out / exercising in the evening, I will not be working out the next morning. I lose all the energy return goodness from the morning workout if I worked out the night before. Not to mention I am helping to build a deck this weekend. I am not sure what kind of activity points I get for that but I am sure it would be a few.